


Too broken to be forgiven

by StarQueen27548



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, F/F, Kissing, Post Season 5, after the last battle, slight self loathing, slight suicide mention
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-22
Updated: 2020-07-22
Packaged: 2021-03-04 02:14:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,430
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24715894
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StarQueen27548/pseuds/StarQueen27548
Summary: After the last battle Catra is thinking to leave for good, but Adora convinces her otherwise. Catradora
Relationships: Adora/Catra (She-Ra)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 97





	Too broken to be forgiven

Catra needed a little time to think alone, she said to Adora when several hours had passed after the final battle. Adora was too busy anyway, Catra thought, everybody had something to tell her and she…she was feeling more and more out of place as more people were arriving.

Catra left without letting anybody notice more than necessary, and now she’s sitting in one of the rooftops of the tallest tower of Brightmoon Castle. With her head leaned against one of her knees and the other leg falling from the roof border, Catra watches as the sun is starting to fade away in the horizon.

Tears are falling from her eyes, without her being able to stop them from falling. She’s killed so many people in an attemp to prove…to prove what? What was she trying to prove? How could she have standed on the wrong side of this war for so long? She’s not even sure she switched sides for the good reason either. She had always felt as if something was not right being a part of the Horde, but when she was certain she still stayed. Her rage, her hurt, it was so much more powerful than her ethics. She is so selfish and evil. 

She should leave Adora. She should go and never look back. It’s best for everyone if she just goes, she’s just too damaged and broken, and the things she’s done… They’re unforgivable. She is unforgivable.

It is decided then, she will leave as soon as the sky turns dark.

She’s lost inside of her own mind, until a voice that makes her heart skip a beat everytime calls her name behind her.

_\- Hey Catra. Thought I’d found you here-_

Catra doesn’t bother to turn her face to where the most beautiful sound she’s ever heard is coming from.

 _\- Really? From all the places in the castle this is where you thought I would be?-_ Says Catra with a smirk

_\- Well… I already searched everywhere else, so...my options were getting limited.-_

Catra chuckles a bit. - _Dummie.-_

Adora sits next to Catra, who turns her head the other way to avoid making eye contact. Adora places her hand over Catra’s thigh. Instinctively Catra removes her leg and holds both her legs with her arms, as she continues to lean her head against her own knees and looks the other way.

_\- Catra… What’s wrong? You can tell me anything, you know that, right?.-_

Catra doesn’t answer, she’s not even making a noise as she tries so hard to stop her tears from falling. Adora moves closer towards Catra, almost touching her body and certainly feeling the warmth she radiates. She dares to break the silence.

_\- Or we can stay here in silence, I don’t mind, whatever you need.-_

_\- What I need to do is to disappear, Adora.-_

Adora hears Catra sniffing and her suspicions that she was crying are suddenly confirmed. Adora feels as if her heart is being ripped apart at the thought of losing Catra once again.

 _\- Catra don’t say that, whatever it is we can fix it_.-

For the first time, Catra looks at Adora, starting to feel a lot of rage swirling inside of her chest. She gets up, and so does Adora.

_\- Adora, there is nothing to fix. Don’t you get it? I am too broken. I’ve done too much hurt, there is nothing I can do that will make up for all the hatred I’ve spread. Sparkles mom is dead because of me, a lot of people are dead because of me. If I had some decency I would jump off this roof and make everybody a favor. –_

Adora is scared as she hears those words. She grabs Catra’s arms tightly and starts speaking in an angrily tone.

_\- No, it is you the one who doesn’t get it. We’ve all have done wrong in this war. We’ve made mistakes, and we’ve made horrible things. Don’t you think people have died because of me too? But it is not by disappearing that you will make amends with what you’ve done.-_

Catra looks away in shame and tries to get away from Adora’s arms, but Adora grabs her tighter.

Catra stills sounds angry, and looks Adora directly in the eyes not caring anymore about the tears falling down her cheeks.

_-Then what do I have to do, Adora? How am I supposed to fix what I’ve broken? How am I supposed to fix me without breaking anything else along the way? It is you the one who doesn’t get that there is no way I can take all of the pieces and make something good out of them. I am leaving tonight. I know you don’t understand, but you’ll thank me someday, it is the best for you.-_

Catra lets go of Adora and starts walking towards the castle. However, Adora’s not letting her go and tackles Catra, and puts her back against the floor. Placing all of her weight over her and forcing her to look her in the eyes, she starts talking

_\- We all have done terrible things. We both are broken, but that’s how it had to be. We had to break ourselves in order to rip the parts the Horde built us with. And now we can build ourselves anew. Together. Catra I’ve fought so much to bring you back to me, I am not letting you go now, I am not going to give up on you. Not back then when you were against the rebellion, and certainly not now-_

Catra tries to get away from Adora, but Adora just pulls her tighter and stronger.

_\- Adora, let me go! I can’t be better, I’ve done too much wrong. Nobody will ever truly forgive me! How could they? Mermista should kill me for what I did. Sparkles should hate me!... You should hate me! I do not belong here, I don’t belong anywhere anymore. –_

_\- You belong where you put the effort to belong in, Catra. You belong where the people who love you are. You are not the same girl who opened the portal, or attacked Salineas. And I didn’t hate you back then, I am not planning on starting hating you now. I love you Catra, it took me a while and to distance myself to realize how deep or what kind of love it was, but even back then I knew you were everything to me.-_

Catra’s body stops fighting Adora’s grip and relaxes against the floor. There are no more tears to cry for Catra, now it is Adora the one whose eyes are filled with them. They stay there in silence, staring at each other. It is Catra the one who breaks the silence first.

_\- I really want to make better. I want to be better. I am so sorry about everything I’ve done. But I don’t know how to do better.-_

Adora lets go of Catra’s right arm to caress her face with her fingers. Catra presses Adora’s hand against her cheek and lets out a subtle purr. Adora starts leaning and getting closer to Catra’s face. Not breaking eye contact, but so close that they feel each other’s lips warmth, Catra speaks.

_\- Adora, I love you so so much. I was so scared of losing you that I did, and convinced myself that it was my choice everytime. I am so sorry.-_

_\- Catra, all is forgiven. I could never hold any resentment towards you. We’ll figure out the rest.-_

Adora closes the space between their lips and feels Catra fully relaxing against her body. It is just natural for them, the way their lips feel against each other. The feeling in their stomachs, the goosebumps. Everything feels just so right. They break the kiss to take some air and make eye contact. And they stay there, for a while, just listening to each other’s heartbeat and breathing. Adora gets up and helps Catra do the same. Placing her hand in Catra’s cheek, she speaks.

\- _The whole world is broken now. The whole universe. It doesn’t matter what you or any of us have done in the past. The only thing that matters is what we’ll do from now on. Help me make everything better, and we can learn how to be better and forgive ourselves along the way. You in_?-

Adora lowers her hand to grab Catra’s.

\- _I’ll try, Adora_.- Catra says as she intertwines her fingers with Adora's.

\- _That’s good enough for me. Now come on, it must be dinner time. I’m starving!_ -

\- _Yeah, let’s go, dummie_.-

**Author's Note:**

> My first Catradora one-shot. Leave what you liked most or least in the comments if you want to and if you have any requests or want to see more Catradora in the future feel free to ask. Thank you so much for reading.


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